Sharing the pain

I've gone back and forth about sharing pictures but I decided to just go for it. If you think looking at these are painful, just imagine trying to sleep with these bruises. These shots were taken two days ago and the bruising is worse today.

The tubes are the most painful. I am counting the hours until they are removed. The Vicodin does nothing but make me dizzy and tired. The pain just won't go away. I've been putting ice packs under my arms and on my breasts and that numbs things, but I think the only thing that will truly help is time.

I am very thankful that I still have no feeling in my stomach otherwise this would hurt like hell.

This is the incision under my breast. It runs from one side to the other and it's incredible painful to wear a bra. The tube placement also makes wearing a bra difficult. If I twist the wrong way or move my arms it pulls on the tube. Major ouch.

Woe is me.

IVF to wipe out BCRA-1?

I read an interesting article tonight about wiping out the breast cancer gene.

A man in the UK has the BCRA gene, as do other members of his family. His mother, sister, grandmother and cousin all had breast cancer, some as young as 27. When the man and his wife were ready to have children they decided to try to eliminate the possibility of birthing a child who also had the gene.

The wife opted for in vitro fertilization and had the embryos screened for the gene. Out of the 11 embryos tested, six were positive. The woman had two clean eggs implanted and froze two others to be used at a later date.

The part of this article that was so exciting to me was this:

By screening out embryos carrying the gene, called BRCA-1, the couple, from London, will eliminate the hereditary disease from their lineage.

Yes, IVF is expensive and very stressful but what a wonderful gift to pass on to your children. I wish that mother a very healthy pregnancy and three cheers for her smarts.

Cool beans

As I've mentioned a dozen times, I organize a mom's group for working mothers. I get spammy type emails several times a month from people trying to sell their products to us. Most get deleted but I got one yesterday that was totally cool.

I'm going to leave her info in, if you'd like to contact her yourself.

Hello! My name is Chrissie Raysor, and I am C. Raysor Photography (http://www.craysor.com).

I am looking to build my new business, and am offering a special for people who book with me from your Meetup Group.

From now until 8/31/08 members of your group are eligible for 50% off session fees and 10% off print prices. Sessions may take place after that date, but the appointment must be made and the session fee paid prior to that date.

I like to think I have a fun style, and love kids and families, and look forward to building my business in Chester County. I'm a Chester County Mom myself, with 2 daughters under 5 years old, and love this area. I love to give back, and am also a member of Think Pink Photography, offering free sessions and prints for women who have battled or are currently batting breast cancer.

Again, my website is http://www.craysor.com, and I hope that you will pass this offer along to your group. Please let me know if you are, so that I can keep you updated on other specials and news for your group.

Thank you for your consideration!

Sincerely,
Chrissie Raysor

What an awesome thing! A friend of mine is a photographer in California and months ago I mentioned that I wished we lived closer so she could take glamor shots of my incisions. These scars are ugly but in the right light they can be a thing of beauty (and hope).

I just might have to schedule an appt to get professional nudie shots taken.

Thankful Thursday

I had planned on typing out how much pain I'm in but thought that would get redundant. I've decided instead to steal Jen's idea and post a Thankful Thursday.

Ten things I'm thankful for today:

1. MIL showing up this morning, with tonight's dinner in hand, and taking Cha to school.
2. Cha waking up easily when I told her that Mimi was coming over to take her to school.
3. All my friends who have called and emailed the past couple of days to check up on me.
4. Matt's healthy body and his willingness to pick up the slack while I'm laid out.
5. My central air and ceiling fan that keep me cool, since the pain meds make me warm and dizzy.
6. My internet connection!
7. Pete the Cat who has been snuggling up to me on the couch all day.
8. My parents who put off their return trip a couple extra days to be with me.
9. That we have a downstairs bathroom.
10. Peace and quiet

Ah, there it is!

The pain has arrived! Holy crap this hurts! Standing up, sitting down, moving my arms, everything hurts!

Imagine the pain of being totally out of shape and then doing a thousand sit ups in one day. Ugh, this sucks! I have been taking Vicodin and I'm guessing that's taking the edge off, but I am still awfully uncomfortable.

On a positive note, my breasts have stopped bleeding.

Another day

I had a great sleep night's sleep. I slept in the recliner and was surprised at how little pain I felt. I hate to admit it but this ugly couch is very comfortable. When I tried to get up this morning I almost screamed from the pain. My hips were BURNING. I could barely stand up I was in so much pain.

However, once I was upright I felt pretty good. The only pain seems to be in my sides and I think that's because I'm still numb from the original surgery. I was curious about where the pain was coming from so I took off the stomach binder to check things out. My sides are every color under the sun. Lots and lots of bruising. That's where all the pain is coming from which makes me feel better. If I bend and it hurts, at least I won't be afraid of pulling stitches or something. It's only bruising and sore muscles.

Last night I changed the dressing on my breasts. I hate to brag but the girls look amazing! Dr. S is a true artist. They are the perfect shape and the scars have been minimized. The incisions are bleeding somewhat so I am back to putting maxi pads in my bras. I've also got bandages over the stitching for the drains. They are on the sides right below my armpits and whenever I move I can feel the tubes pull. I am seeing Dr. S on Monday and he'll be pulling the drains out then.

He called to check up on me this morning. He said he's still not completely happy with the right breast and wants to go in and make changes. He said he also probably go in and take out another 4 lbs from my stomach. He wants to see how things settle first.

Matt is home with me today and I'm planning on taking it very easy. Dr. S said he didn't want me just sitting around, that I should keep walking and drink lots of water, but that I shouldn't carry anything (or anyone). I'm thinking I'll be fine to drive tomorrow and take Cha to school. I can drive as long as I'm not taking the pain meds.

Quick update

Pre-op with Dr. S, my Knight in Shining Armor!

All is well! The pain isn't as bad as I feared, but I'm still a bit doped up so who knows how it will feel tomorrow. My plastic surgeon said there's still issues with my right breast, so I'll be going in for another surgery. He took out 2 lbs on my breasts and 3 lbs on my tummy, and is scheduled to do more lipo in another couple months.

Once again I had to stand naked in a room while a man drew on my body and Matthew watched. Lucky for me that I don't have issues in that department. My biggest concern was that I didn't vomit on the doctor's head, which was a possibility. I will be dramatically smaller, but not quite sure what that means. I'm curious to see what I'll be when the bandages come off and the swelling is gone.

I'll update later if I have more energy.

P.S. I've got two drains. :(