I've written several posts in the past two months and them removed them. If you happened to catch them you'll know that my oldest brother committed suicide. His attempt was on Saturday November 7th and he passed away on Thursday November 12th.
The loss of my brother and in particular the way we lost him has changed me more than anything cancer related. It has completely twisted the way I view the world and everything under the sun. I have always considered myself a sympathetic and empathetic person, sometimes overly so, but after losing my brother I am dumbfounded by how little I knew about grief and loss especially in regards to suicide.
Last weekend I read the news about comedian Artie Lange being rushed to a NJ hospital. Artie is a writer and personality on the Howard Stern radio show, which I have been listening to for 20 years. After waking up to that crew every morning and spending so much time 'with' them it's hard not to feel like they are almost family. Over the past couple of years Artie has opened up about his drug and alcohol problems. His admissions have saddened me and have caused more than a few tears on my part.
When I heard that he was rushed to the hospital my first thought was that he overdosed. I said a quick prayer for him and was thankful every time I logged online and did not see a death notice. If he accidentally overdosed on drugs and was taken to the hospital, they had to make him better, right? If he was going to die from an overdose it would have already happened, right?
Then the rumors started coming out that it wasn't an accidental overdose. Poor Artie had a breakdown, took a bunch of sleeping pills and drank some bleach. Or so 'they' say.
His people released a statement saying:
“We can confirm that Artie is in the hospital. Artie has chosen to keep all information on this matter between him and his doctor. There will be no further comment.”
It could be attempted suicide, it could be accidental overdose, or it could be he choked on his pancakes. The general public doesn't know, nor do I think we have the right to know. All we need to know is that he is in the hospital and in need of prayers.
Artie's condition is on my mind constantly. I keep hoping for some positive news all the while praying for his family. Those five days between when my brother tried to take his life and the moment he succeeded were hell. I remember each minute vividly and don't think I will ever forget the pain and anguish.
I am praying for you Artie, you baby gorilla.
