I just went back to re-read the posts following my last surgery. This whole surgery thing has become like childbirth. You are nervous and scared to death beforehand but when it's over you have trouble remembering the pain.
I am scheduled to show up at the surgery center tomorrow at 10:15 am. Cha has a playdate at a local park scheduled for tomorrow night at 6:00. It's a big playdate celebrating the birthdays of all her friends born in August. I am seriously contemplating taking her myself. I looked back to the entry following my last surgery and read that the pain wasn't too bad afterwards. I was up and walking around but found it difficult to bend. I am hoping for the same tomorrow.
My anxiety has been full-force the past week, starting with a breakdown in Dr. S' office last Wednesday. I started crying and just couldn't stop. He gave me a script of Valium which I've been taking once or twice a day. With the thoughts of the upcoming surgery, work concerns and issues with friends, I was stuck with a mighty week long migraine. I have been especially irritable and worried and just can't bring myself to do deep breathing or relaxation exercises. Cha's school is closed this week so she is home with me. That in itself leaves no time to relax.
I have been trying my darnedest not to become impatient with her and am very thankful that Matt has been taking over and giving me a break when he comes home. Sometimes I just need an hour of quiet time and that rarely happens when they're a happy 2 year old running around.
Tonight I am having some friends over to laugh and play games. I am hoping it will make the night go quickly and help me sleep.
I'll update tomorrow when I can. (Have I mentioned how much I want this whole business behind me? I am ready for it to be DONE.)
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