I spoke to cousin Missy tonight. She battled cancer (Hodgkins?) when she was 23 and was very kind to give me the scoop on chemo and radiation. She also shared stories of other women who have survived breast cancer.
One of my biggest fears has been taking care of myself and Charlotte while I endure radiation. I have many wonderful friends who have offered to help, but the reality of getting up in the morning and taking care of a child after a day of treatment seems overwhelming.
Missy helped me to see that if I have a mastectomy there won't be any radiation. It will be gone and I'll 'just' be dealing with the emotions of losing my breasts and the pain of healing. It won't be the weekly sickness for 3-6-9 months or whatever. That is hopeful.
She also pointed out that I can survive radiation. People will be there to help and I will not be alone. Matthew is a wonderful father and has the ability to do it all himself if he needs to. I am hoping that my mom will be able to come visit when the time comes.
I get these moments of extreme worry but talking to others who have been there helps tremendously.
Thanks Missy Love!